10 Most Memorable Quotes From Boardwalk Empire

Among the numerous TV shows and movies made about the mob, Boardwalk Empire sits at the top with the likes of The Sopranos and Goodfellas. This isn’t surprising since Hollywood’s gangster flick expert Martin Scorsese served as the executive producer. He also made sure that the HBO series started off on a high by directing the pilot.

Throughout its run, Boardwalk Empire was nominated for 11 Emmys in total and won three. It was also nominated for 8 Golden Globes and won two. The magic wasn’t just in the violence and good acting. The dialogue was euphoric too. Here are some of the show’s best quotes.

10 “I Need A Bath, Some Chow, Then You And Me Sit Down, And We Talk About Who Dies.”

Al Capone says this to Nucky Thompson when he and his gang arrive in Atlantic City to offer him help against Siccillian gangster Gyp Rosetti. It’s a classic quote that shows how various crime outfits form alliances to take out a common enemy.

Rosetti had proved to be a very worthy adversary to Nucky in the third season. Given his short temper, he never hesitated to go to the extreme lengths of violence. In one episode, he even beat up a stranger who had offered to help him change his flat tire.

9 “Three Things Are Difficult To Understand. The Work Of The Bees, The Movements Of The Tide And The Mind Of A Woman.”

A businessman and board member at the Mayflower Grain company, Joe Kennedy has links to the illegal alcohol trade. He is also close friends with Nucky. In the very last episode of the show, he says the above words to Nucky’s wife Margaret Thompson.

The very intelligent Margaret then issues a classic retort, saying: “Here is an experiment for you. Think about the things you want in life, then picture yourself in a dress.” That’s a perfect version of ‘you have no idea what it is like to be a woman.’

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8 “I’m Making A Statement”

In the first season, Capone’s boss Johnny Torrio takes out Chicago crime boss Big Jim Colosimo before taking his position as the city’s top mob boss. A reporter from the Chicago Tribune who is digging into the murder shows up at Al Capone’s bar to asks him to give a comment about the murder.

The reporter suspects that Torrio took out Colosimo. Capone agrees to give a comment and so the reporter gladly grabs his pen ad notebook. To his shock, Capone hits him with a liquor bottle before descending on him with kicks. And when Torrio shows up to inquire what’s going on, Capone responds: “I’m making a statement.”

7 “I Find That You Really Don’t Know A Man Until You Play Cards With Him.”

In the fourth episode of the fourth season, Nucky goes to discuss the Tampa land deal with Arnold Rothstein (Michael Stuhlbarg). Rothstein isn’t easily convinced so he and Nucky go to play poker. He tells Nucky that poker always brings out the true nature of a man.

Nucky outsmarts Rothstein, and as a result, Rothstein starts making reckless moves instead of quitting. Nucky feels that Rothstein is too obsessed with winning so later on, he makes a plan to cut him out of the deal. He decides to do a deal with another gangster called Lansky instead. In the end, Rothstein gets exposed by his own quote.

6 “And He Took The Loaves And Fishes, Looked At His Disciples And Said: F*** It, We’re Going Into The Whisky Business”

Bootlegger William McCoy really gets creative with Matthew 15:36 in the pilot episode. At the start of the series, McCoy is introduced as the captain of a ship. He doubles as a bootlegger in the Prohibition Era who supplies foreign liquor to various ports on the east coast.

He says the above words to Nucky as they are discussing business by the harbor. Nucky agrees to buy $35000 worth of liquor every week from him.  But how did McCoy even think of a line like that in the first place? Someone call the Pope. McCoy needs prayers.

5 ”Who’s Feeling Like A Hero?”

In another iconic scene, Capone shows up at a rally for the democrats with his goons to cause havoc. His boss Torrio wants Cicero mayoral candidate Joseph Z. Klenha to win. The Democratic candidate has also promised to crack down on the mob if he is elected.

With a steel pipe in his hand, Capone asks, “Who’s feeling like a hero?” before proceeding to beat a person in the crowd with it. The rest of the people run but the message has been passed: Supporting the democrats can be very detrimental to your health.

4 “Anyone Who Says Money Doesn’t Buy Happiness, Doesn’t Know Where To Shop”

In the third episode of Season 4,  Nucky complains how money has made him more miserable. He explains that he used to be happier when he was an ordinary crook in Atlantic City. Things have become more complicated for him and his life is always in danger.

Sally, who also happens to be one of the strongest female characters on the show comes up with a classic retort. She implies that anyone who is unhappy with money simply doesn’t know how to use it. Wow! A round of applause goes to the writers of the episode.

3 “The Moral Of The Story Is: If I’d Cause A Stranger To Choke To Death For My Own Amusement, What Do You Think I’ll do To You If You Don’t Tell Me Who Ordered You To Kill Collisimo?”

At the beginning of the show, Rothstein is the biggest gangster in America. When he finds a man who he suspects of killing Big Jim Colosimo, he begins to tell him a story of how he once killed a man for fun. Rothstein who often comes off as calm chooses his words carefully.

It’s no surprise that he rose to the very top. He does things differently. Instead of going directly into torturing the man as other gangsters would, he goes on to play mind games with him.  As a result, he ends up serving us one of the best quotes in the series.

2 “The Only Chance You Have Of Entering The White House Is On A Guided Tour”

Nucky Thompson and New Jersey Senator Walter Edge weren’t always on the best of terms. When the senator screws Nucky on a deal, he tries to console him by saying he’ll make it up to him when he becomes president. Nucky who totally despises the senator sees him as incapable of ever becoming president so he lets him know.

Initially, Nucky treats the senator wells and tries to use him to get the Road Appropriations money worth $30 million but the senator ends up playing him. Edge is also portrayed by Geoff Pierson, a man who has appeared as a politician in countless movies and TV shows.

1 “Most Fellas In This Business, They Get Their Retirement Papers Straight From The Grim F***in’ Reaper.”

In the second episode of Season 5, Torrio reminds us all how most gangsters retire. They don’t go home after getting old and get a pension. Most of them are called by the Grim Reaper, meaning they end up dead.

Torrio was actually so afraid of getting the same fate as other mob bosses before him that he relocated to Italy and handed over the Chicago outfit to his deputy Al Capone. This happened after there had been an assassination attempt on his life, which he survived.

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