Breaking Bad: Jesse’s 10 Funniest Lines

With the stellar writing for Breaking Bad, the characters in the series had some incredible story arcs between the five seasons that were on air. Jesse Pinkman arguably has one of the most complex character arcs as he turns from a mediocre drug dealer to one of the most successful and profitable meth manufacturers in the state of New Mexico.

Jesse’s emotional storyline came to a close this year with the release of El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie, but his time on Breaking Bad supplied fans with an abundance of hilarious quotes. Here are the 10 best.

10 “Yeah Science!”

Starting off the list is one of Jesse’s most well-known quotes in all of Breaking Bad. For the first couple of seasons on Breaking Bad Jesse was presented was a rather dim-witted partner of Walt that was used for comedic relief.

In the show’s first season, Walter tells Tuco Salamanca that they will be able to produce four pounds of meth each delivery, which leaves the dynamic duo in a predicament since they don’t have access to that many sinus pills. Walt tells Jesse they won’t need pseudoephedrine because he has other plans. Jesse is relieved and exclaims, “Yeah Mr. White! Yeah Science.”

9 “Yeah B****! Magnets!”

In the first half of season 5, Jesse and Walt run into a bit of a predicament as the Albuquerque police department have incriminating evidence in the form of a laptop. In an attempt to destroy/steal the evidence, Jesse has the idea of using a magnet, which ends up being the winning idea.

Old Joe helps build a giant magnet to destroy the laptop, which is first tested out in his junkyard. When performing the test, the laptop flies from Jesse’s hands and is obliterated on the side of the truck. Excited that their plan was actually going to work, Jesse cheers, “Yeah B****! Magnets!”.

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8 “This is my own private domicile, and I will not be harassed”

Jesse and Walt have one of many close calls in the season 3 episode “Sunset.” Hank ends up tracking the RV to Joe’s junkyard, and attempting to break open the door before Joe comes and stops him.

Jesse and Walt are inside and would have likely been arrested if it weren’t for Joe’s help and Walt’s quick thinking. Walt tells Jesse to say, “This is my own private domicile, and I will not be harassed.” Jesse says the line and throws in a “B****” for good measure.

7 “So roll me further, b****”

Hank is forced to abandon the RV at Joe’s junkyard after he gets a call saying that his wife is in the hospital. Marie is fine, but Saul had one of his employees phone Hank so that Jesse and Walt had time to destroy the RV.

Hank ends up nearly beating Jesse to death, which puts Jesse in the hospital. After he is released, he is rolled out in a wheelchair and lights up a cigarette. The male nurse tells Jesse he has to be another 20 feet away from the door. Clearly not caring about the rules, Jesse tells the nurse, “So roll me further b****.”

6 “Yo, yo, yo. 148, 3-to-the-3-to-the-6-to-the-9. Representin’ the ABQ. What up, b****? Leave it at the tone!”

Before Skyler found out how her husband was a crystal meth cook, she was extremely suspicious of her husband’s behavior. To try to get to the bottom of things, she redials a number on a call that Walter had hung up on.

The number was Jesse’s, and since he doesn’t answer his phone, she hears his voicemail message say, “Yo, yo, yo. 148, 3-to-the-3-to-the-6-to-the-9. Representin’ the ABQ. What up, b****? Leave it at the tone!”. Not only is Jesse’s message hilarious, but Skyler’s reaction to the surprise voicemail was priceless.

5 “Ah… Wire…”

Another one of Jesse’s hilarious and memorable lines comes from season 1. One of the first times Jesse and Walter are cooking in their RV, they end of getting stranded in the middle of the desert. When trying to brainstorm ideas of how to get home, Jesse suggests building a battery, a robot, or even taking parts of the RV to make a dune-buggy.

A car battery was clearly the best choice, so Walter tries to build one and uses copper to create an electric current. When he tries to test Jesse and asks him what element comes to mind, Jesse very confidently says, “Aaah, wire.” Clearly, wire is not an element, but copper is! You were close Pinkman!

4 “What do I look like? Scarface?”

Walter and Jesse always had a bit of a rocky relationship. When they first start cooking, Walt is mainly the cook of the operation, while Jesse works on selling their product. Things were slow early off, especially before they were able to sell pounds of their crystal meth at a time.

Walt tells Jesse that it is unacceptable that he isn’t able to sell it faster and asks him why he can’t just sell the whole pound at once. Jesse responds by saying, “What do I look like? Scarface?” Jesse and Walt would eventually start selling their drug by the pound to Tuco Salamanca, which turned out to be a bad idea.

3 “Yo, Gatorade me, B****”

A lot of Jesse’s famous quotes come with the word “B****,” including the line “Yo Gatorade me, b****.” This line comes in the middle of the series after Jesse is recruited by Walt to help him cook meth for Gus Fring.

While cleaning their equipment, Jesse says that they ought to have people working for them to clean their equipment since they were part of such a big operation. He also suggested that they have waterboys to supply them with Gatorade while they cooked meth.

2 “You know what is okay to put in hot dogs? Huh? Pig lips and a**holes. But I say, hey, have at it b****es ’cause I love hot dogs.”

The Fly is one of the most divisive episodes in Breaking Bad history. The whole episode revolved around Jesse and Walt trying to kill a fly in their lab because it was a huge contamination, according to Walter.

Jesse says one fly shouldn’t matter because the people buying their drugs aren’t exactly picky. Jesse even talks about consumer quality in America, explaining, “You know what is okay to put in hot dogs? Huh? Pig lips and a**holes. But I say, hey, have at it b****es ’cause I love hot dogs.”

1 “I’m a blowfish! Blowfish! Yeah! Blowfishin’ This Up!”

In one of the earlier seasons of Breaking Bad, Jesse’s crew is ripped off by a couple of meth heads, and Walter forces Jesse to go back and retrieve their money. In short, things don’t go according to plan for Jesse. The druggie couple have a child that Jesse has to be careful around, and the wife ends up smashing her husband’s head in with an ATM machine.

Jesse is understandably scarred by the situation, but Walter tells him to use the story to intimidate people. He compares Jesse to a blowfish and is somehow even able to make Jesse feel better with this analogy. Jesse hilariously says, “I’m a blowfish! Blowfish! Yeah! Blowfishin’ This Up!”. Jesse even blows up his suit in a later episode to make himself look like one.

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