When Jasper Beardley decided to be a subsitute teacher on The Simpsons, little did he know he was creating brilliant meme fodder. That was probably because memes didn’t exist, yet. If they did, Jasper wouldn’t have known what they were, much less cared about them.
Still, “That’s a paddlin’” is the line that launched a thousand memes. Hopefully, none of them ended with anyone actually getting paddled. Nobody with a meme generator is encouraging that. Anyway, without further ado, let’s dive in and check out some of the best memes Jasper and his paddle have ever spawned – and hopefully avoid a paddlin’ in the process.
10 Good Grammar
This probably the most educational thing that came out of Jasper’s turn as a teacher. Everybody knows someone who makes one or all of these mistakes on an almost daily basis. You dread their emails, using every ounce of self restraint to not edit them and send them back. Next time you get that email, just send them this meme and let Jasper do the work for you.
9 Words With Angry Friends
Whether it’s Scrabble or Words with Friends, anyone who has tried to play a game like that has inevitably run into a problem like this. There’s always a word that you know is a word but the game won’t acknowledge.
Well, Jasper is here to set things straight, especially if you challenge him on the word paddlin’. He doesn’t care what some game says. Jasper knows what he’s doing. Now, you just have to hack the game and add in the right spelling of your words. That should be super easy, right?
8 Clean Up After Yourself
Jasper just wants you to act like an adult. Make a mess, you clean it up. It’s just that simple. But if your roommate is inclined to help with the household chores, just drop this meme on their timeline and let your boy do the rest. If Jasper is about one thing, it’s people being respectful to each other and cleaning up after themselves. Feel free to print this out and put it up on your fridge. If you’re lucky, your roommate will get the message.
7 Stay In Touch
Social media etiquette is as important as etiquette in real life. The funny part is that as little etiquette as there is in real life, there is even less online. Ever read the comments section on a YouTube video? Yikes.
All Jasper wants you to do is reply to Mabel’s comment. It’s only polite. Maybe people would be nicer online if there was the threat of a paddlin’ looming over them. Some people just need an impending paddlin’ to get them to do the right thing.
6 Canoeing
The type of paddlin’ Jasper is talking about is a very specific type of paddlin’. But for a lot of people, they immediately think about getting out on the water and paddling a canoe or a kayak. It’s fun! Okay, well some people think it’s fun though many of them are crazy. Regardless, you still have to be safe, though. Jasper has long been an active advocate for safety in water sports so this meme makes perfect sense. Also, the whole double meaning of paddlin’ thing.
5 Work
Work is work and you should take it seriously. But everyone deserves to blow off steam once in awhile by skipping work. Go see a movie. Do whatever it is you do to stay sane – within reason, of course.
Skipping work more than once is an iffy move at best, though. It’s not something you should be doing all the time. If you hate your job that much, then you should probably try to find a new one. Jasper could probably help with that one, too.
4 No Flipping
Jasper’s a simple man, and he likes his simple memes. Straightforward, to the point, and unaltered. So needless to say, he’s going to be more than a little miffed if you go and tinker with his format.
In fact, doing such a thing is entirely likely to end up in… yes, you guessed it, a paddlin’. That said, you’re obviously going to want to think twice before popping Jasper’s meme into Photoshop. He’s obviously a little specific concerning what you can and can’t do with it.
3 My Little Paddlin’
If you ever suspected that Jasper had passed away and his soul was reincarnated as Rainbow Dash, you’d be right. That’s an oddly specific prediction but you’d be right nonetheless. Apparently, Rainbow Dash is quite the strict disciplinarian when out with friends on a canoe trip.
Perhaps the little pony should refer to one of the previous memes on canoeing. At least everyone has their safety gear on. It looks like they already read that meme.
2 Post Paddlin’
In case you were wondering precisely what the aftermath of a paddlin’ looks like, Jasper provides some context to ensure there’s no confusion on the matter.
It’s a bit difficult to imagine what Hans Moleman could’ve possibly done to raise Jasper’s ire to such a degree that it’d entail what could only be the most vicious paddlin’ Springfield has seen over the past decade, and honestly, we’re not sure we want to know.
1 Medical Issues
He’s not wrong. If you are suffering from cardiac arrest, then you get the paddles. It’s just not the type of paddlin’ Jasper is used to giving out. When it comes to a medical paddlin’, he’s probably more used to receiving that experience. But if the person on the table survives this, you can bet Jasper is going to give him a proper old school paddlin’. Wasting Jasper’s time dealing with your health problems? You had better believe that’s a paddlin’.
